Day 40

Well lastnight when Brandon came home, he wrote me a long letter,... I hope he changes like he said he will...
but now I have a problem with Andrew. Where do these guys get the idea they can just act the way they do? Seriously.
Im almost 100% convinced that they are just using me for a place to stay...
I cant wait till Ronnie & Rich gets here... At least I'll have some actual friends who'll respect me... totally wish D was coming, but hes in yellowstone.
anyways, I updated my xanga account... deafbats.xanga.com
talked to Jared,... asked for andrew and chip to help around the house,...
than andrew got mad about it or,... something, idk why the hell he suddenly got mad....
those two cause so much fricken drama, its not even funny. andrew not as much...
but seriously, it's like being in an awful relationship!
The only person I had this much problems with was Bass and Donnie....
I am totally not a drama causer, so idk why this is all happening...
but hey, it would never happen if people knew how to be respectful.
idk if your an ass,.... just be respectful in the fucking house.
[ugh! my dad is giving me all this crap to read.... and I dont even understand what the hell im reading!!!!]

Anyways... I've been sick all friggen day... and its pissing me off! I hate being sick! =[
And Jared is too,... and I wanna take care of him... but yea... Id jus get lost.

anyways, andrew put in money into my paypal... yay....
they went to work, and brandon gave me a hug before he left since I was feeling down.
idk if he really is a friend, or not... but I hope he is...

anyways, my dad came home while I was in the middle of updating my profile, making dreads, listening to music, and looking at the whole business situation....
I miss having the house to myself... but I know when the boys move, I might get really bored... but hopefully rich and ronnie will come soon, but it'll still be a few months =[

anyways, my dad and I went out to get sushi! :D yaaay
omg, it was sooooo friggen good!!!!
than we talked a little bit, I already knew my dad doesnt like my friends, but I didnt think he'd have much of a problem with Jared, which made me really really sad... he just doesnt trust him. =[

but I know he is gonna think rich and ronnie are weird too... but you know what, what ever! Judge everyone... I dont care....
but yea... I finally finished my profile for myspace again...

day 40...
I dont remember if I even called Bass today, but I did text his mom... but no answer.
Jared posted something about not knowing if we're dating or not, which I dont know either...
but pretty much from the moment we hooked up, we told everyone we were dating....
and I dont want it to be like last time, where I never actually get asked out....
But he has my heart.... and thats all that should really matter.
Maybe I should introduce him fully to my dad...
But I dont think my dad would be too happy about me dating someone I've only known for a short period of time.
I mean, lol, I wouldnt, but than again, I'd probably ask, and be a closer parent so in a way, it probably wouldnt matter as much